HAs A CO-WORKER, BOSS OR LOVED ONE TOLD YOU THAT YOU NEED ANger Management?

  • Do you ever have angry outbursts? Or, do you get angry and keep your feelings inside?

  • Have friends, family members or co-workers told that you have a "short fuse" or "bad temper"?

  • Do you often realize later that your anger was out of proportion to a given situation?

  • Have you found yourself in a rage over something minor?

  • Do you stay angry for days after an upsetting event?

  • Do you wish you could be able to feel and express anger in a healthy manner?

Maybe no matter how hard you try, you just can’t seem to control your angry reactions. Maybe someone cut you off in traffic or pushed in front of you in line, and you flew into a rage. Perhaps that slow cashier just brought you to the boiling point. You may even look back later and realize that your reaction was out of proportion to the event. Yet, in the moment, you are powerless to stop it. The frequent angry reactions can lead to physical symptoms, such as headaches, digestive issues, high blood pressure, heart disease and other health concerns.

Or, maybe when you get angry, rather than act out, you suppress your emotions. Perhaps in your childhood, you were taught that being angry is not ok. Maybe when you have disagreements with people, you decide it is best to keep your feelings to yourself so as not to upset anyone. Suppressing negative and intense emotions can create other issues, such as anxiety or depression. 

Whether you typically react with outbursts or repression, lacking healthy ways to express anger can cause problems in every aspect of your life. Your personal relationships may suffer. Or, you may experience difficulties getting along with your co-workers or even keeping your job. Regardless of the way anger manifests itself in your life, you may be feeling at loss as to how to deal with it. 

ANGER IS A NORMAL, HEALTHY EMOTION

Everyone experiences anger. 

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Situations that set off angry outbursts also trigger the fight/flight response. This response is designed to help the body respond to the threat your mind perceives. As you experience the fight/flight response, a physiological chain reaction automatically begins in the body. Adrenaline releases, the heart rate increases and blood flow diverts to muscles, along with many other changes that take place to prepare the body to defend itself. However, you may be experiencing this intense physical and emotional reaction when danger is not actually present. The continual arousal you experience from getting angry is not good for your emotional or physical well-being.

Anger can be a positive force. It can motivate us to make positive changes in ourselves or our society. It can help us to improve the lives of mistreated people or animals. But, anger becomes a problem when you lose control and are unable to be rational or reasonable. It can impact every aspect of your life, from your physical health to your ability to resolve conflict with your loved ones and coworkers. Angry outbursts can even lead to legal trouble. Thankfully, therapy can help you learn how to relieve anger and feel in control of your reactions.

 Anger Therapy CAN HELP YOU FIND LONG-TERM HEALING AND RELIEF  

As a therapist who specializes in treating anger issues, I can help you have healthy responses to upsetting situation, maintain better relationships and improve your overall health. Together, we will find out what is at the root of your anger and heal it there. The therapy I offer is more than anger management. Rather than simply developing tools to manage negative feelings, it provides a way to get to the root cause and to resolve it.

When people get angry, they usually feel it in their body. They may have tightness in their chest, a stomachache or physical tension. During anger therapy, I will help you to focus in on the physical feeling of anger in your body. The inappropriate angry reactions you experience today are connected to situations when you felt angry in the past. We will use the feeling to track you back to the root of the anger problem. While it started at the root, it appeared again in other events. What typically happens is that these triggering events, starting with the root cause, get connected together and an “anger chain” develops. When something distressing happens in the present day, you react with all of the negative emotion that you have carried or “chained together” over the years.

Once at the root cause, we can do the work necessary bring healing to your upsetting memory. Remember, anger can be a normal, healthy reaction. It can protect us. So, therapy is not about taking away your ability to feel anger. Rather, it can offer you a way to release all of the old anger from the past. One of my clients described the process as a way for him to empty the rocks that he had been carrying in his backpack. He felt like a weight had literally been lifted.

Sometimes, anger is a secondary emotion. It acts like a protective device to cover to another emotion. The angry outbursts can mask what is really going on—hurt, sadness or fear. It is important to also discover if you are struggling with underlying issues that need to be addressed.

Whether you have kept it inside or experienced explosive angry outbursts, in our sessions, I can help you discover healthy ways to express anger so that you can then react to situations for what they are. One of my clients told me that she found that little things that used to cause her to “fly off the handle” no longer did. She told me her husband even commented on how different her reactions had become. She reported that their relationship had grown closer and that her husband said he felt like he was able to feel more relaxed around her

You, too, can feel greater balance and peace as you go about your day. With the help and support of a compassionate therapist, you can heal the wounds anger has left in your life.

But you still have concerns...

HOW IS THIS DIFFERENT FROM anger management? AREN'T YOU JUST GOING TO GIVE ME A LIST OF THINGS TO DO?

anger therapy mt laurel nj

You may have read or heard that, when you feel yourself get angry, you should take a deep breath, count to ten, walk away from the situation or punch a pillow. These behavioral tactics work sometimes, but they do take work on your part.

Anger therapy is not about learning how to manage your anger. In our sessions, I will not focus on telling you what to do when you feel angry. Rather, therapy is a way to let go of the accumulation of anger that has collected over the years that cause you to overact today.

This is a powerful therapy. It can help you to change your automatic reactions to things that once caused upset. You can gain a new perspective on all of the things that have led to strain and frustration in the past. 

I'M ALWAYS MaD. HOW CAN anger therapy POSSIBLY HELP?

anger therapy mt laurel

Regardless of how angry you feel, you can release old anger from the past and find that you can now react and respond with emotion appropriate to what is going on in the present.

We are a team. I will not tell you what to do or how to feel. I will help you to focus on getting to the root of the problem. Once we get to the root and resolve it there, coping with anger can become easier. You may notice that you can gain a new perspective, improve your relationships and feel more at ease within yourself. 

I SHOULD BE ABLE TO MANAGE THESE FEELINGS ON MY OWN.

Have you already tried? Has it worked? If you could do this successfully, you would have done so by now. With this therapy, you eliminate the root of the anger so that your reactions become appropriate to the event. It becomes automatic so that you don’t have to work hard at learning how to control anger. There is nothing wrong with seeking help. You don’t have to struggle with your anger alone. 

YOU CAN RELEASE THE ANGER WEIGHING YOU DOWN  

Releasing negative emotions such as anger is something that is very hard to do on your own. You are worth the time and effort. Your relationships are important. Your health is important. I know it can take courage to take the first step. Call me at 856.238.5036 for a free 15-minute consultation. Or email me at tish@calmpathwayscounseling.com.

 

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